The Pages | Handling Your Anger
I know that you will probably disagree, but honestly, the Tarot’s court cards can be your friends, if you let them!
I thought I’d take a look at the Deadly Sins (surprisingly, none of them is Facebook – although it should be!) and today WRATH seemed most suitable.
Mostly I’m a peaceable sort of creature, but every now and again I can become splenetic with rage and for anyone in the vicinity (whether they are involved in the scenario or not) I am ashamed to say that I can be utterly unreasonable.
Sometimes it’s not a sudden venting … sometimes it’s a low simmer that one must feed; endlessly stoking the angry fires, as Robert Burns so memorably describes the sulky, sullen Kate in his epic poem Tam O’Shanter “nursing her wrath to keep it warm.”
Letting it all erupt like Vesuvius isn’t good, but neither is bottling it up – that’s a heart-attack waiting to happen! But I think that there are constructive ways to experience and handle anger … and so I asked the four Pages what they had to say about it all.
So, Pages can represent beginnings and messages … here we go!
Page of Swords
Begin to communicate and articulate your anger. Start to name your emotions. It’s not enough to throw plates and have a screaming match. What’s REALLY behind your anger – has your ego been pricked? Are you frightened? Are you jealous? Are you embarrassed or ashamed?
Let your anger serve its purpose. It’s a message that something deeper, such as hurt or fear, needs to be addressed.
Page of Wands
Begin to exercise and be active. Furious with facebook? Fling on your running shoes or walking boots and go for a brisk half an hour outside. Get creative with it: want to batter your husband with a frying pan? *looks guilty* Pull on your boxing gloves and give that punch-bag a blinkin’ good thumping! Exercise has been shown to reduce stress levels.
I truly believe that women do not have enough opportunities to be SAFELY aggressive – boxing, martial arts, rugby, football … we can benefit from being really physical through play. If in doubt, thump a pillow into submission 🙂
Page of Pentacles
Be aware of what’s going on in your body. Is your pulse up? Is your stomach in a knot? Are your shoulders so tense that they are up around your ears?! What happens first? Can you catch your early anger signs and take control?
Getting yourself some breathing space before you respond to triggers is also helpful. The Page of Pentacles would also suggest, I think, learning to meditate, becoming mindful of the processes that you are experiencing.
Page of Cups
Begin to forgive. Begin to be loving.
Yes, I know, how very BLEEDING HEART liberal of me 😀
Of course, it’s not always appropriate to forgive – nothing can make you feel worse than some pious ninny telling you that you need to forgive someone when the only place you really want to bury the hatchet is IN THE BACK OF THEIR HEAD.
If you can’t quite stretch to forgiveness, that’s fine! Begin to think about what is making you angry in a way that does not send your blood-pressure spiralling. I cannot recommend step-by-step query process from Loving What Is by Byron Katie highly enough >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>look >>>>>
Cups are the suit of relationship and this includes your relationship with yourself. If you can recognise that you are struggling to find ways to control your anger, and it’s at such a level that you are damaging your relationships or your health, it’s perfectly OK, actually advisable, to get help from outside sources.
So there you have it – just four court cards and the most minor ones at that. Imagine what all 16 might be able to suggest!
Do you get angry? What works for you? *I need all the help I can get*